5 Things I Learned About Myself After Changing Lanes…Again

5. I don’t own a lot.
It’s weird because I know people my age who have soooo much STUFF. After being evicted years ago, I learned the greatest lesson: Things do not define you…you do that. I mean, it sounds obvious but sometimes you have to go through things to catch those little nuggets of wisdom. When it was time to say PEACE OUT CUB SCOUT to Philly, all I had to do was put my junk in a few Rubbermaid totes. Voila! The most expensive things I own are my laptop and my bed; everything else is disposable. I guess it’s a good thing, what ya think?

4. I’m not good at saying goodbye.
Every person that I bid farewell had me in tears within minutes of the departure. Ok, so maybe I was just emotional but when you’re leaving and don’t know when/if you’ll be back, it’s worth a tear or two.

3. I’m a tad bit obsessive.
I so thoroughly enjoyed organizing sheets of paper, pens, socks and hundreds of random things that I felt had a ‘special place’. That also means that I was packing until the VERY last minute…which brings me to the next point…

2. I’m a professional procrastinator.
Don’t get me wrong, when I have to do stuff in groups or for other people, I get my sh*t done. However, I take my sweet ass time when it comes to my own business. The semi-humorous aspect is that I am neither embarrassed nor ashamed of it. Why beat myself up when I am proud of the results I get? No one is ever harmed in the process of my procrastination so I shall continue to make it do what it do.

1. I have a dangerously compartmentalized heart.
I’m sure that there are people out there like me but events like this help me to better understand this. There are people who get wrapped up in the emotional aspects of decision-making and then there are people like me. When I left MD for college, it was an excruciating process but not because of the emotions. The financial aspects and logistics threw me for a loop! And I felt like this process was the same…stressin over moving parts the entire time. I can admit that I was sad. Period. Packing up my items and leaving all of my recent (and few lifetime) friends was difficult BUT I had an agenda…Shoot! I’d say I still do. I want to be a highly-effective teacher and I’m willing to put aside any sorrow in its respective box. It sounds harsh to the faint of heart but anybody who has ever wanted anything will agree that you weigh the situation and take the heavy side. At the end of the day, those emotions are as useful as cotton on a roll so I take care of everything else and make my momma proud.

5 Things to NOT do with an Ex

New hot bod!

My close circle (and some extended folks that matter) know that I got out of a semi-serious relationship a few months back. The whole scene was tragic and vividly dramatic—mostly on my part. I fell into this deep, dark, stank ass place that I didn’t think I could get myself out of. I had people coaching me from every angle…friends, bloggers and the Man upstairs.

I mean, it was dark yall! I can’t even scratch the surface of how bad things were—or so I thought!

You see, I thought the physical world was crumbling beneath my feet. I thought that without this person, I couldn’t go on. I thought I would never be happy again. Even worse, I felt the same damn way the LAST time I broke up with someone. I felt the same epic sadness multiplied times a bajillion.

So this time, I put my energy into positive things. I lost the obnoxious-untruth-‘happy weight’ that wasn’t so damn happy after the break up. 26 pounds to be exact.

If you noticed, thank you verrrrry much.

While I was busy tweeting, blogging (kinda), working out, eating better (not quite right) and knitting (yup, granny all day!)—I had an epiphany. Actually I had several of them over the course of the few months. Realized that in order for me to be ready for the right person to come along, I gotta rid myself of the WRONG person; no matter how hard, sad or troubling it may be. These are just some of the things I learned…the hard way.

DON’T:

5. Let them leave stuff at your house
Nope. Take your socks, shoes, random notebook and rusty tee shirt somewhere else. I don’t wanna open my closet and be reminded of you every day. For every article I hold onto is an excuse for me to see your face—no thanks. K bye.

4. Cyber-stalk them
There are literally a million and one things to do while surfing the net. Don’t waste time mulling on your old lover’s Facebook profile or tweets. Read mine J

3. Have text message wars
If you’re not gangster (lol, er) enough to say it in person, don’t say it at all. My English teacher in high school (s/o to Mrs. Cindy Martin) taught me a LOT of things and one of the few things I actually remember is that you need to be able to defend EVERY word you put on the paper. So if you don’t mean any of that mess you talkin’, don’t type it.

2. Give in to temptation
Oh, my favorite! When you decide to finally leave someone alone, they will find a way to crawl back into the picture. If you’re used to late-night cuddle/cutty sessions with them, its gonna be like telling a 1 year old to lose the binky. You’ll have to go to drastic measures to fight it but it is worth every measure.

1. Pretend like you’re over them
The average person will probably have at least 10 boyfriends/girlfriends in their lifetime. No real stats to back that up, just an educated guess and I have friends who have quadrupled this number so I’m being modest here. Anyway, I found that getting over a person means you have to get over them. Physically, emotionally, spiritually and psychologically. If you pretend that this transformation happened, you will be RIGHT back in that dark place when the next person say bye to you!

So yea, I hate to admit it but I’m one of those women who is on a voyage with herself. Scratch that. I LOVE that I’m discovering my own damn happiness. It’s weird because I never knew that you really have to give up something ‘good’ for something GREAT to come in!

C’est vrai!

Until next time…
Little Chocolate Woman

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5 Ways to NOT be Awesome

I have it figured out everyone! Hip Hip Hooray for Maya!

After weeks of avoiding my blog like the plague and contemplating themes, I have finally figured it out. I’ve decided that I can commit to rambling/pontificating/talking about one topic in five points. Nothing more, nothing less. My professor advised me to keep things short and sweet. And I advised myself to be consistent. I could easily have that word and that word alone on my gravestone. CONSISTENT. Anyway, I’m happy to have made a commitment. Yay me!

And to my 11 readers: Please hold me accountable. If I don’t keep the posts coming, feel free to verbally attack me. I’m ready for the motivation and what better way to embarrass me publicly than in my own sandbox?

Here goes nothing…

After spending years at a private institution with a limited number of computers and lab space, I have grown seriously bitter towards a certain type of student. I thought my worries were over when I began my time at a public institution with a bajillion computers. I was wrong. It is as if this student lurks in the dusty shadows and corners of every college campus waiting to get on my damn nerves!

This first FIVE post is to you. Stop annoying people. Stop breathing my air. Get a laptop before I pummel you. Please.

Five things to NOT do in the computer lab on campus

5. Assume that we all want to hear your music.
The computer lab is as sacred as the library and on most campuses, it’s the same place. Of course everyone needs motivation to get their work done but I’d really appreciate it if you kept your motivation between your ears. K thanks.

4. Have an unofficial group study session
I know that most colleges have group study space. I just know they do. So how come Bobby, Cynthia, Keri and Gerald think its fair to talk about how tough the assignment was or how confused they were when putting it all together? I don’t care if you guys pass or fail. Actually, I don’t care about you period and I want you to be quiet. K thanks.

3. Ask fellow classmates about the project that’s due in an hour
This one is especially tender to my heart…When I’m under immense pressure to finish an assignment that’s due in like an hour, why in the world would I want to talk to YOU? What I want is to finish my assignment. What I really want is not to hear about your anxieties and questions that make me nervous about my own damn work. I really, really want for you not to sit next to me and try to get pointers in a roundabout way. Go sit somewhere else and let me panic in peace. K thanks.

2. Eat sloppy snacks.
Gross. Especially when you get up and leave cheese puff dust all over the keyboard or crumbs everywhere. In my hood voice, you nasty.

1. Purr/Hum/Sing at the computer
Imagine that you’re in a place with fifty other people. These 50 people have a shared goal. They all want to get work done and go home. Many of them are easily distracted. When you make noise, it bothers them. Now come back to reality. STOP being weird and ruining my work environment. Maybe this only happens at public universities because I never had to watch a grown man purr at a monitor at my last school. And although it was, hands down, the funniest thing I’ve seen all day…I don’t wana see that mess again.

Until next time…
Little Chocolate Woman

Gonna Cut My Head Off…

Have you ever done something that you never thought you would do?

That’s what I’m doing right now…well actually, who knows what I’m doing as you read this but as I type this, I’m asking myself why I’m doing this. What a whirl of weirdness right there! Anywho, at the suggestion, or rather demand of my professor Shenid Bhayroo, I’m typing my first blog post.

Herein lies the problem. I don’t know what to talk about.

I don’t have a nifty theme or special angle and as a young journalist, I know that whatever I type is trapped in the ether forever so I must be choosy.

What would people want to read about me? Do people care about what I have to say? I wish someone could reach into my brain and find ideas for me, for free (and less painfully).

So what should it be? Food? Lack of exercise? Bizarre neighbors on my eerie block? Friendship?

If you were me, what would YOU write about in this lovely blog space?

Walnut Bridge Coffee House VOSOT

Korey and Maya’s VO

Here’s our VO of the Trenton Transit Center.